For some reason, people have this idea that I live off somewhere in fantasy land, where kids are always good, laundry is never neglected, and there is always a hot meal on the table. So, here it goes. This was an average day last week.
6:00--Wake up to my wristwatch alarm and go walking (I'm as quiet as I can so the kids will stay asleep).
7:00--Kenna wakes up, so I bring her downstairs for our beverage of choice (soy milk for Kenna, strong coffee for mom). A little bit of Doodlebops always helps out as well.
8:00--Blair goes to work. I get the little ones dressed and fed. Breakfast is oatmeal! Kenna pitches a holy fit because she wants to feed herself, so I let her. Twenty minutes later, I'm still scrubbing oatmeal off the highchair and the floor underneath. Klara insists that she needs pink sprinkles for her oatmeal because she is a princess (she's wearing a cheerleading outfit with a pink Cinderella dress over it). Korben likes raisins on his, Karis prefers cranberries. Kyler wonders why he can't just have cereal. Katie sprinkles Nesquick on hers (which I didn't even know we had). Kelsey turns down the eggs because of cruelty to animals and then complains that her family eats oatmeal for breakfast way too often to be considered normal.
9:00--Summer is here, so we get ready to go to the pool. Kelsey and Katie make sandwiches and pop some corn. Kyler grabs two towels from upstairs (which are damp because he grabbed them from off of the floor of the bathroom). Karis can't find his goggles. Korben pulls his trunks down and moons his sister. Klara screams and runs out of the room. Kenna found the popcorn that the girls put by the front door and now it's all over the floor (and in her mouth).
1:00pm--We are back from the pool, and very tired. No, take that back. I am very tired. The kids sit down to read for an hour. I rock Kenna. Klara pretends to read, but she is actually bothering her brothers by sticking her feet in their faces. Kenna falls asleep. I write for about thirty minutes until I am informed by my kids that reading time is over. The afternoon progresses as I try to get some cleaning down and fold a load of clothes. I send the kids outside to play. Katie and Kyler soap down the trampoline with a bar of soap and the hose so that they can slide and jump all over it. Klara gets a new bottle of water and pours it into the bubble blower to try to make bubbles. Karis and Korben help her out by getting my dish detergent and adding it to the mix. Kelsey is content with her ipod and the swing set. I get two business calls. One was interrupted because I had to quiet Klara, who was upstairs singing to Kenna as she was sleeping in her crib. During the other one, I was in the pantry with the door closed so that it sounded quiet.
4:00pm--Kenna wakes up. Toys are dragged out. Klara finds the sharpie markers and put "blush" on her cheeks. I discover this right as she is heading toward Kenna with a pink marker. Her princess dress is covered in bubbles, mud, and sharpie markers. Kyler, Karis, and Korben are playing transformers and making a cartoon strip. Karis complains because Korben is copying him. Kyler decides to abandon the cartoon and go on a bike ride. Katie goes along. Kelsey begs to get on myspace.com to check her "comments." Blair calls. He is on his way home, and I have no idea what's for dinner.
5:00pm--Blair's running late. Pasta is cooking on the stove. Klara has to go to the potty. Kenna follows us in. Klara passes gas quite loudly on the potty. Kenna laughs and tries to make the same sound by blowing spit bubbles between her lips. She realizes that she is spitting on the bathroom floor and begins playing in it as I am holding Klara on the potty so she can relieve herself. Klara starts laughing, now. I bride the kids to clean up. I tell them they can watch a show on the Disney channel if they pick up the house during commercials. If you ain't working, you ain't watching.
6:00pm--Dinner. Only one spilled cup of water (a record). However, this spill goes all over a Kelsey's plate so she needs to make another plate of spaghetti. Korben shows us a dance he invented by standing on his seat and rotating his hips in a circular manner (scary). Klara doesn't like the tomato chunks in the sauce. Kyler asks why we don't have dessert.
7:00--It starts raining. The little ones run outside to play in it. The trampoline is all sudsy because the kids never cleaned up their mess. Kyler clears the table. Katie loads the dishwasher. Kelsey wipes the table and sweeps the dining room.
8:00--Bathtime. Blair bathes Korben, Klara, and Kenna. I return e-mails. I have no idea what the older kids are doing, but no one is screaming, so I consider that a good sign.
9:00--The older kids get ready for bed. I rock Kenna to sleep. Klara goes to bed in mommy and daddy's bed. After I get Kenna to bed, I fold laundry on my bed as I tell Klara stories. Korben and Karis hear me telling stories so they come in my room to listen. Finally, I get the laundry folded and give Klara some books to read. I send the boys to bed and come in to sing them their lullabies (yes, I still sing their lullabies to them...). I go to Kelsey and Katie's room and find them still in their clothes, listening to music and talking. I give them ten minutes to get in bed.
10:00pm--I tuck in Kelsey and Katie (who are still talking and laughing when I leave their room), put away the folded clothes, and get ready for bed. Blair puts Klara in bed with Kenna and kisses the boys. Toys are still on the floor, and the laundry that I started earlier has not been put in the dryer. I return some e-mails, do some writing, wash the few dishes that are leftover from dinner, stick the clothes in the dryer, tie up any loose strings, and head to bed.
12:00--Eventually, I make it to bed.
Okay, so that is a typical day for me. Now you know--we're all in this together.